4 years ago, I was officially a husband. Mind you, it was not just a title. Simply put, from that day onward, my wife’s sins are my accountability. That kind of commitment or power is not to be taken lightly.
Today, I will tell you people won’t tell you.
PUNCHES WILL START TO COME IN ONE WEEK BEFORE YOUR WEDDING.
This is what my good friend told me. “Expect that, Naz. Suck it in. Absorb and don’t let it ruin your mood. Things will auto-correct themselves eventually. “
WIFEY’S DECOR VENDOR WENT MIA
2 weeks before the big day, wifey’s caterer called to say the decor people went MIA. Tak panic my wife. My wife dah start stressed out and feeling emotional about it. Caterer refunded the decor payment. It was a consolation. No point in creating a fuss and get mad about it. It will not help us to solve this problem.
My wife was at her wits end. I said ” It’s ok. We go 80’s style. White plastics sheet. Bare void deck decor. Just like those days when our parents, uncles and aunties got married. Orang nak cakap, biar dorang. Mulut dorang. I don’t give damn what people going to say. You and me, we stick together. “
Of course, I did ask help from my circle of friends. Alhamdullilah. One of my friends’ contact is a wedding planner. She forwarded us a contact. As of now, me and wife are trying to recall the company. This Kakak, was our angel. She was fully booked that weekend. She was willing to help us out but on one condition. Wifey has no say about the decor style. We cannot be choosy. But what I like about this Kakak. All she asked was, “Baju warna apa?”
Plus, “Adik, jangan lupa tau. Letak kipas kat pelamin bila hari sanding. Nanti, make up cair. “
This Kakak and her team came, did their work. She quoted us $750.00, I think. Reasons for being quite cheap because she was using our wedding to try out her new design. The best part, she never asked for our payment till 3 months after the wedding. I was like what ? We really want to pay but she kept saying later I update you later I update you. 3 months passed.
Practically, that’s the only major punch wifey got. The rest are minor-minor ones like no electricity because town council never unlock the unit, one neighbour complained about the noise. This neighbour always complained and make a big fuss whenever there is a function at the void deck as I found out.
The night before nikah, I could not sleep till 4am. Baca surah apa pun, tak lepas and tak complete. My memory was jammed. Couple of my guy friends called asking me whether ok ke tak. It helps after talking with them. Still, for that night, I do not know why. I cannot recite any surahs till finish. Something blocked !!
Alhamdullilah, the nikah went well. Wifey and her support team of family and friends, did a splendid job in getting everything organised.
#Hint : For groom, be prepared for your friends to come after your nikah and chill with you till 2-3am in the morning.
KENDARAT (SERVERS) NOT ENOUGH
The way I see it, it was a case of high number of guests. Seriously, even if the caterer provided 10 kendarat people, confirm plus chop not enough. I have to be thankful to my aunties, uncles and cousins who had roped in as back ups.
Malu sey, before the wedding, I have declared to all my aunties, their job is to lepak and eat. Kendarat settled.
TUKANG CUCI PINGGAN THROW TANTRUMS
Due to overwhelming of guests, the dishwashers threw tantrum. Why ? Because their working hours and routine was disturbed. The reception start at 11am. They claimed usually about 11.30-11.45am, they will start their work. But for my wedding, they started to wash the plates and utensils exactly at 11am non-stop till about 3plus, I think. They just disappeared after that. Taking a break I presumed.
My cousins and my brothers had to take over the job just to get clean eating utensils and plates out. Headache !! My majlis only ended at about 6.30pm even though it was planned to end at 5pm.
NOT ENOUGH CHAIRS AND TABLES
1500 cards went out. What do you expect. This was totally an oversight by my parents. Also caught my parents off guard with the turn out, actually. People say it always double the number of cards. So, roughly 3000 people came.
Some of my friends came and don’t get to eat properly. They ate standing outside the void deck. My friend told me, there were 2 uncles quarreled over a space to eat. Gulp!!
One thing about sedara is, they will lepak and will not move.
So, if I may suggest, GTB and BTB, you guys need to prepare an area for your sedara to lepak. One consideration to note is not to block the flow of human traffic and your entrance.
When we returned from wifey’s place, inside the wedding car, wifey said” B, biar betul ni B. Ramai nyer orang.” I was dumbfounded myself. I do not know what to expect when we got off the car.
There were other major setbacks during the wedding at my side. But I won’t share it because it is very personal.
The only thing I can say is that, make sure keep your parents and family members involved. Your parents must also keep you in the loop with what they want to do. Communicate closely.
Nevertheless, things will go wrong for your wedding. It can be a minor or major. I have provided wedding video coverage to numerous couples. Not one single wedding is super perfect.
Look at this way, sometimes a little imperfection is all you need to make your wedding perfect. There will be people who will make sure your wedding will go smoothly. I have witnessed it every time.
Like my caterer, my wedding is one of those rare wedding events that challenge his creativity and used up all his cooking ingredients within 3 hours. Menu that I never ordered pops up like Spaghetti, Butter Squid, Cereal Prawns and many more lah. Of course, me and wifey never got to taste it. On the fly, he ordered his staff to do ad-hoc marketing for cooking ingredients. The excess spending was nearly $6000.00.
In my opinion, the only thing that you should invest heavily is your food. We did. My wife instructed her caterer to cook additional on excess budget of $3000.00 if there is a need.
When your big day comes, enjoy every moment of it. What you have planned, let the event take care of itself. Let it go. Don’t get involved. When you get involved, you will tend smile lesser and lesser and lesser.
Don’t know why my wife mentel semacam when she read the earlier blog post. I bet she will mentel again after reading this post. I guess it brought back the memories. Too bad, we only have good photos to reminisce. Something heartbreaking happened to the wedding video.